Monthly Archives: December 2010

Merry Christmas!!

As I am sitting on the Go bus on Christmas day I get a little teary eyed. How do you split up Christmas fairly between three families? I have three this year, my mom, my dad and my boyfriend.

I had a fantastic Christmas eve filled with lots of food and good company. We spent Christmas eve with my boyfriends dads family. I woke up Christmas morning with my boyfriends family and had a Christmas morning I haven’t had in years. They were so nice to me and totally made me feel welcome. But now here I am on the Go bus alone going to my mothers while my boyfriend spends christmas with his mothers side of the family. I’m sad because I feel like my mom misses out on Christmas with me.

Its always been Christmas with my mom and boxing day with my dad. But for the last couple years its been me with my mom on Christmas and me and my boyfriend with my dad on boxing day. Of course it’s easier to split christmas when your parents are together, because then you only have two families to see. But that’s not my family. I mean it is my fault since I didn’t speak up about how I felt, but deep down I hoped he would have known… I guess men aren’t the mind readers we always wished they could be. I know for next year I should just tell him how I feel. Oh well, it’s Christmas!!

The couple sitting in front of me look miserable. They aren’t wearing wedding rings, maybe she’s mad because she didn’t get the ring she was hoping for?!?! It looks like it might be their last Christmas together.

Merry Christmas everyone!!!

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Dear Boyfriend

Dear Boyfriend,

What is it like to date someone who writes publicly about your relationship (even though there is so much more she could say but chooses not too since your friends read the blog)? And how do you feel when you read about her posts on ex boyfriends? Do you feel jealous, or angry, or maybe even sad? Also, I would love to hear your side of the relationship (of course after I approve it).

Love to hear from you.

Sincerley,

Gilfriend.

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Post Birthday

Well it turned out to be the best birthday I’ve ever had!! I’m not sure if it is because of the changes I’ve made in my life the past year, the friendships I’ve patched, or the new relationship I am in, or maybe it was a combination of all the things new and different, but no matter what it is I could not have been more thankful for the love and support on my 25th birthday.

I only have 3 more days until the holidays start and I could not be more excited about what’s lined up. With three Christmases to attend, I jump right into it starting Friday. I am so excited to be spending Christmas with my boyfriend, it will be our first Christmas together and I could not be happier spending it with anyone else. I just hope I have some time to sit back and relax.

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One more day…

My feelings may be really silly and unnecessary, but I am getting a sick feeling in my stomach about my birthday. If you read my Birthday Wish post then you would know that I have had some bad experiences with my birthday. I am not looking for sympathy, but just a place to express how I am feeling on the day before the (big?) event.

I’ve been sick the last couple of days, which really hasn’t helped the situation. But yesterday I was so overwhelmed with everything. I wasn’t feeling good, I didn’t sleep the night before, work is super busy and the place I chose to go for my birthday ended up being a strictly 25 plus bar and some of my friends are not 25 yet. So I had to decide where to go, again. I had a few options but I kept getting more and more confused when people were throwing ideas at me. Don’t get me wrong, I am grateful for the help from my friends, but I wasn’t feeling the best and it was so overwhelming that I almost cancelled my birthday.

I still have this feeling in the pit of my stomach that makes me cringe when I look at the date on my calendar. I don’t know if it will ever go away. My boyfriend has been amazing. He has been understanding about my feelings over my birthday. He even let me cry it out last night in the car in the gas station parking lot on our way to buy me a new outfit. I really couldn’t have asked for a more understanding guy to give me his shoulder to cry on. It wasn’t even worth crying over, but then again I am a girl!!

I should be grateful for having friends, even if it were just a few, who are going to help me celebrate. I should be thinking positively about it, but it’s hard.

What a sob story!! 😉

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The Second One

I was about to call this post “number 2” but then realized that did sound right.

Anyway, so the second guy who (hopefully) temporarily skewed my view on guys happened about a year after the first guy. I met him through friends. He worked with a few of my best friends during the summer. They warned me he was going away for school to the U.S but I still wanted to meet him. At this point in my life I had an image of the “perfect” guy, and I will never forget the moment I saw him. My heart stopped and I was in awe, he was the epitome of my “perfect” guy. I knew I was in trouble from that moment on. He could tell me to jump and I would drool and ask him how high. It was sickening.

Well, I fell in love with him (at least his looks) in only two months and he was gone. I went back to school and wanted to go about my life like I never knew him. But I couldn’t. I could not stop thinking about him and the time we spent together those two months. I knew it was a mistake, he was off on a sports scholarship and I knew what kind of guy he was. Every once in a while he would call, or email or MSN message me, and I would lose myself all over again.

We both went home for the holidays, and I could not have been happier. I had no seen him since the summer and I just wanted to be with him again. We spent a lot of time together during that break, and on my last day I told him I wanted to be with just him, and him to be with just me. He said ok, HE SAID OK!!!! Exactly, he said “ok”. That should have been the first sign.

During my reading week I flew out to see him, he was late picking me up at the airport because he was hung over and couldn’t get out of bed. When we got back to his dorm, he wanted to nap. That night he told me we were going to meet up with some friends but we wouldn’t be drinking. Well, I guess he meant I wouldn’t be drinking but he would be because as soon as we got there his friends threw him some beers, he chugged them back and continued to play drinking games while I sat there totally ignored and not one person (even the girls there) offered me a drink. The week didn’t get any better, and one night while we were both drunk he decided to tell me that he slept with the two girls from the first night (the ones that wouldn’t talk to me, I guess that makes sense) since he’s been back from the holiday. He then went on to tell me that it didn’t count cause we weren’t in the same country, and we were only in a relationship when we were in the same country. Most people would say “Eff that” and move on, well I was still so in love with him that I let it go. I was obviously very upset, but I forgave him.

Well it didn’t stop there. When I went home he barely talked to him until he came back for the summer. We hung out a lot and continued our “relationship”, but at the same time he was seeing someone else. I didn’t find out until a friend of mine told me that he was always texting the same girl, so I confronted him and he admitted to it. But I let it continue, and let him use me for the summer. It took me about 9 months to get over him and to start dating again. And even after that much time I was still worried about getting into any kind of relationship with a guy because I thought it would just turn out the same… which I guess it kind of did.

Anyway, I’ve learned from this one, just like I’ve learned from the first guy and the third guy. But it still didn’t stop me from meeting the wrong guys. It took one more for me to finally learn my lesson.

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Meeting the Family

I met my boyfriends parents before we were even dating, which really helped the ease into having dinner with the family. But tomorrow I am meeting the Aunt and Uncle. I really have no idea if I am supposed to be nervous. I’ve never just met the Aunt and Uncle before, normally it’s at a family occasion like Christmas or Thanksgiving when everyone is already there and you are quickly introduced and move on. Tomorrow we are going over to his Aunt’s house for dinner, just the four of us. It feels like I’m meeting his parents for the first time. I don’t know what to wear or what I am going to say. What if I embarrass myself, like I did the first time I met his grandmother, I almost died from the embarrassment.

It was the first time I was meeting his mom’s side of the family. He invited me over for dinner, which I didn’t think was a big deal since it wasn’t a formal invite to dinner, but more of a “Well we can eat at my place”, because we were doing something that night. Anyway, we get to his driveway when he breaks the news that we will be eating with his entire family at the table. I freaked, got sweaty and nervous and could barely see straight (you can’t throw that on someone so last-minute), but I had no time to think. We walked inside and went into the kitchen where he introduced me to his grandmother, “Grandma, this is Amanalynn, Amanalynn this is my Grandmother” so my response was “Nice to meet you” but while I was saying that she goes to introduce herself again “Hi, I’m his Grandmother,” so I was stumped. Rather than saying “nice to meet you” again, I said “Ok”… just OK!!! WHO SAYS THAT?!?!? His mom laughed a little and I’m pretty sure his dad smirked… I wanted to go into a corner and cry, but dinner was ready and we had to go sit down right away. I had no time to recuperate.

What if I do something stupid tomorrow? I’m so clumsy when I’m nervous. At least he is saving me from embarrassing myself in front of his entire family at Christmas.

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Drunk Texting: the Good, the Bad and the Ugly

I was inspired by Danielle to write this post. And although her’s is quite hilarious, mine is more in reference to why you shouldn’t do it because Danielle’s are funny to read the next morning, but there are times when it can be quite embarrassing.

I’ve learned the hard way. I had my fair share of drunk texting/emailing/calling. And yes some of them are really funny and the next day were the jokes at the breakfast table, but there were some where I was so embarrassed that even drunk me knew to delete them before I woke up the next day in hopes that would help me forget. But it never did, and I usually woke up the next day too embarrassed to even leave my room. The worst part about embarrassing drunk texting is having to deal with it the next day.

There was this one time when I was in university I went out with some friends for Halloween to the university bar. I wasn’t even planning on drinking very much, but that didn’t go over well when all my friends were. Anyway I had just recently met this guy and he drunk texted me a few weeks earlier telling me he loved me… it was weird since I had only known him for a week at this point. I ignored it, but received an apology from him the next day. So that night while I was partying it up, he messaged me telling me he was on his way to the bar we were at and he would be there soon. An hour or so goes by and he still never showed up, so I made my way into the bathroom where there wouldn’t be much noise to give him a quick call, but I ended up dropping my phone and lost the back to my brand new cell 😦 so I left the bathroom since I thought my phone was broken. After a few more drinks and still no sight of this guy, I went to check to see if my phone worked and it did… which was probably the worst thing that could have happened. A few angry texts later and one voicemail I finally get a message back from him telling me he ended up falling asleep and that he was pissed off at me for waking him up.
Anyway, I woke up the next day and re read the texts I sent and I knew that either I had to apologize and hope he didn’t think I was crazy or ignore it and just never talk to him again. Well I chose to apologize, though I should have chosen the latter.

That was not the first or last time I sent a drunk text, but I have definitely learned to not be so stupid. Now I try to message only my friends because those end up being really funny when you’re sober and generally don’t make much sense.

P.S. If you want to read some hilarious drunk texting, check out this site (If you haven’t already) http://www.textsfromlastnight.com/

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