Monthly Archives: July 2011

Random News

Dear readers,

I am pleased to announce that a change has been made. Thanks to my personal meeting, I was recently offered another job.

This position is exactly what I’ve been waiting for. It’s the reason I went to school for what I did, and when the opportunity came up I had to jump all over it!

Two weeks today I will be starting my new adventure with a new company and a new position. I’ll be in the same field, but a new industry and a better title!

The sad news is that I’ve found most of my posts have come from the extra time I’ve been afforded at my current company. I’m not one to go home, open up my computer and type a blog post. When I’m home I like to work out, relax and just do about anything other than be on a computer. This is because I’m on a computer for 8 hours every day. My fear is I will not be able to provide as many interesting posts (not that all of my posts are very interesting) as often as I’d like.  But I could very easily be jumping to conclusions. Who knows, maybe I’ll have so much to share that I will change my ways and post on week nights/ends.

 Either way, I will find the time for all of you.

Oh and other news: I’m probably getting another car, which means I won’t miss the city anymore!!

Some random things: 

  • I’m like really confused why most of my views come from the google search “make bed” and “how to make bed”. Do that many people not know how to make their bed???
  • All my hard work on training for the half marathon feels as though it’s been thrown out the window. I’ve been drinking too much on weekends and the longest run I have been able to do in the last 3 weeks is 10K. The half is in 24 days, I might be screwed.
  • As a sub note to the above, I’m pretty sure I’ve gained a couple of pounds (did I mention I lost 16 since Christmas?!?! Yeah, not anymore)
  • I currently LOVE taking pictures in Sepia – apparently EVERYTHING looks better in Sepia
  • My best friend told me on Saturday that having one nail painted a different colour from all the others is fashionable:

(I like it)

  • I might get a feather in my hair
  • Did I mention how excited I was about getting a new job?? Well, I’m REALLY EXCITED!

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Dreams: It’s what we’re made of

This morning I heard that Statistics Canada is no longer tracking divorce rates. Hmmm… one reason they said is because it will save them money. But the question here is why the hell does it cost so much to track these stats? Are there really THAT many people getting divorced? Another reason they said is because more and more people are living together for a long period of time without tying the knot.

What kind of hope does this provide all of us hopeless romantics who envision our lives as one big love story straight out of the movies?

I’ve imagined that I will meet the man of my dream (*ahem prince charming of course*) and we would fall madly in love. The kind of love that NEVER fades. The kind of love that people are jealous of. And the kind of love where you never disagree on anything (as if that exists). I imagined that he would propose to me in the most magical way possible.  Maybe by spelling it out in roses on a large open field surrounded by willow trees, or maybe flying me to Paris and proposing at the bottom of the Eifel Tower (although, I’ve heard that it’s not as romantic there as I thought. There are a lot of tourists, apparently). We would have the most romantic wedding and not a single person would have a dry eye in the house. Our parents would buy us our first home (HAHAHA!!!!!) and we would go on the honeymoon of any newlyweds dream (I’m still deciding whre that would be). We would move into our beautiful home with a white picket fence and a wraparound porch. We would have three children, two boys and a girl, and I would be a stay at home mom and… So apparently I’ve imagined my entire life to be a Hollywood love story.

But tell me, what’s wrong with dreaming?

Well, that’s exactly it, they are dreams. The reality is that there are people who get married and are madly in love and stay together for 60 years. And then there are people who get married too quickly, believing they are in love, and a couple of years later it doesn’t work out. And there are people who get to know each other, fall in love, and get married but fifteen years later divorce. But the overall trend here is that people give up on their dreams.

The boyfriend’s parents have been married for 26 years. And the boyfriend’s grandparents have been married for over 60. And my parents, well they divorced when I was 8.

This past weekend the boyfriend and I talked about what the difference is between a couple that stays together for 26 years versus one that doesn’t. I asked him “have your parents ever had a rough time in their marriage? And if so, how did they handle it?” He really didn’t know the answer. Part of not knowing is because he’s a guy and most guys wouldn’t ask their parents something like that. The other reason he didn’t know the answer is because he really never saw too much “unhappiness” coming from his parent’s relationship.

But what he has noticed is how supportive they are of each other. He’s noticed that no matter how wrong one of them may be, the other one supports them 100%. His mother will wake up super early on a Saturday morning to go for a long run with his father because that’s what his father loves to do. His father will stand by his mother’s side when she makes decisions/comments about her children’s lives, even if she is wrong. This may be the biggest challenge I will have in my relationships. Thanks to my stubbornness I may have some hurdles to overcome when it comes to 100% supporting my spouse.

Another thing the boyfriend and I talked about was giving up. This brings me back to letting go of your dreams. We all (well most of us) fight for what we believe in. I fight for finding the job of my dreams. I’ll keep fighting until I do. So why can’t we fight for the relationship of our dreams? We fell in love with our spouse for a reason, and when you made those vows at the altar, they weren’t just empty words. At that moment, you were living your dream. So when things get rough, what do most people do? They give up, because divorce is so easy these days. But if we all fought for our dreams, then we could work at keeping the relationship alive.

I’ve never been married, but from what I can tell, marriage is not easy. It takes some self sacrificing, some hard work and a ton of team effort. Just like buying your dream home, or going on your dream vacation, everything requires a little bit of work and a little bit of time (and usually a lot of money).

Fight for your dreams. We have them for a reason!

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Date Weekend

If you follow me on Twitter, you know that the boyfriend and I went to Montreal. If you don’t follow me on Twitter, you should!

Anyway, this weekend the boyfriend and I made a trip out to Montreal, Quebec for some us time. Well, we actually drove out there for a reason. The boyfriends sister’s boyfriend (haha Jerry much?!?!) recently started a new job that brought him out to Montreal for 6 weeks. And the boyfriend being the super nice person he is, he offered to drive her out to Montreal for the weekend. I’m not complaining, I got a little trip out of it too.

We started our long drive after work on Friday and didn’t get into the city until after midnight. We were both exhausted, and no matter how much we wanted to take a walk around the town, we just couldn’t get ourselves to leave the room once we checked in. So, we slept, and it was great!

Saturday morning we went for a short run to get our day started. It was 10am and it was already scorching hot out. We weren’t entirely sure where our hotel was located in relation to the main part of the city. But as we started our run we realized that the main street was right out front. We decided to run along that road to find a nice place to go for breakfast (after our run and a shower) and we ran into a street festival. How perfect! We really didn’t make any plans for the weekend. We booked our hotel room and decided we would just go and see what happens. This street festival worked out great! After our run, we walked to a restaurant for breakfast and walked the rest of the day up and down the festival.

Since it was so hot, we thought it would be a great idea to head over to a patio for a cold brewski. We were exhausted! But, we were determined to finish this day off right. We made reservations at a recommended restaurant and headed back to the hotel to get ready.

Getting ready consisted of both of us napping, barely leaving us time to get ready and get to the restaurant on time. But when we arrived at the restaurant it turned out we really didn’t need to make a reservation. There were TONS of tables available. The place was massive!!

The best part was that the street festival also included a band, which just happened to be right in front of the restaurant we were eating at. Once we finished our meal, we headed to the street to find a nice patio to watch the band. When we got outside there was a massive crowd at the bottom of the street, so naturally we were curious and headed over to see what the big commotion was all about. Well, it turns out we chose the BEST weekend to go to Montreal if we wanted to see the most random things ever! There was a parade. At first we had NO idea what this parade was all about, but we saw floats like these:

 

Until I asked someone what it was all about. He told me it was to celebrate Jean Paul Gaultier (Who the heck is that?!?!)… Apparently he is a designer. I didn’t really care too much about WHO it was for, but more about how ridiculously awesome and random this entire weekend was turning out to be.

After the parade ended, the boyfriend and I found a patio that had space available (there wasn’t much left) and we ended up at this Spanish club. It didn’t matter anyway we sat on the patio and enjoyed a couple of beers while watching the festivities. The boyfriend’s sister met up with us a little later on, and we made our way to a couple more pubs before calling it a night. But before we could do that, the boyfriend’s sister’s boyfriend insisted we needed to try this poutine place. So we hopped in the car and drove around the city to find it. I was not convinced that it was the “best poutine”, but I was wrong. It was delicious!! I haven’t eaten that much junk food in a long time. And although I felt disgusting, I was satisfied!

Sunday, the boyfriend and I slept in a little before our long drive back. But before we could leave, we had to buy two dozen Montreal bagels. I’ve heard only good things about them. We almost didn’t buy ourselves one before the drive, but we were starving and it was breakfast time, so we both got a BLT and it was heavenly.

It turned out to be a great date weekend.

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A Bucket List for Schmucks

I’ve recently been inspired by a fellow blogger over at The Next Moment to write a list of things I want to do in my life, also known as a bucket list. However, these are things I would like to complete before I’m 30 and in no particular order (I will add to the list if/when I get inspired):

  1. Sky dive (this may not happen, but I’m going to put it up here)
  2. Run a half Marathon
  3. Run a full marathon
  4. Travel to Greece
  5. Travel to Paris
  6. Attend a cooking class
  7. Become a fitness instructor
  8. Look (and feel) amazing in a bikini
  9. Find a job I love
  10. Buy a house
  11. Own a real diamond (in any format, preferably in the engagement ring format)
  12. Go an entire day without being negative
  13. Make a new friend (a good one!)
  14. Let go of expired friendships
  15. Buy a real pair of sunglasses (not the $20 ones)
  16. Go to the airport and hop on the next plane (without planning beforehand)
  17. Buy a really expensive pair of shoes just because I want them and not because I need them
  18. Teach somebody something new
  19. Volunteer for Habitat for Humanity
  20. Keep my hair blonde
  21. Buy a coffee for someone in line behind me at Tim Hortons (The boyfriend already did this when he was supposed to do it with me there)
  22. Do something really nice for someone unexpectedly
  23. Read more (I know this is vague, but I can’t chose how much I want to read since I used to read ALL the time and recently I don’t read at all)
  24. Go to a strip club
  25. Throw myself the BEST 30th Birthday party ever!

What’s the number one thing you want to do in your life?

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Love Is A Battlefield

Sometimes I think I have it all figured out. And other times I realize I’m only 25 and there is no way I have anything figured out.

This past weekend was hard. It was a great weekend over all, but it was the point in our relationship that made me see things a little more clearly. Sure, I haven’t figured it all out yet, but I’m confident enough to say that I’m close.

This past weekend the boyfriend and I hit a couple of road bumps. None of which caused any permanent damage, maybe just a few scratches that were easily repaired. But these bumps made me realize that I have a great man in my life. I’ve always known he was a great guy (probably the best guy I’ve ever dated), but I never truly realized how perfect he was for me.

I’m extremely stubborn and when I think I’m right, I’m right! But these thoughts don’t really get me anywhere. In past relationships I would never have budged. I would have stuck to my guns no matter what! But I’ve come to realize that sometimes I’m not right (*gasp* I know, it’s crazy right?!) Sometimes my reactions are uncalled for and sometimes I need to apologize (this is something I was not very good at, and I’m still working on it). But I’ve realized that the boyfriend is worth these changes.

I’ve never had anyone who was this good to me. Sometimes I don’t believe that I have someone this great. I resort back to my old ways of thinking and pull myself into a hole where I can hide my feelings. I sometimes forget that he treats me with all the respect in the world and assume that this mistakes he makes are in spite of me.

I do not blame anyone but myself. I allowed myself to be in the relationships I was in for as long as I was. I allowed these guys to treat me the way they did, and I made myself believe that it was love. But sometimes it’s easier to blame others. Sometimes it’s easier to turn your back on the ones that really care and face those who treat you badly. And sometimes, but only sometimes, you get a glimpse of what could be and are terrified that good things just can’t happen to you. But no one is holding you down other than yourself.

This past weekend made me realize that I’m my own problem. I have to stop resorting to my old way of thinking (blaming others for my own problems, feeling sorry for myself and being so negative). It’s time I realize what I have, and what I have is more than I could have ever asked for.

I’m so in love with my boyfriend. We are coming up on a year, and although I’m sure I’ve said this before, this has been the best year of my entire life (so far). I still get flutters in my chest when I think about him and I hope they never die out.

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I Miss the City

I’ve been very fortunate to have a place to live. I love that I can save money and do the things I want because I have been given the opportunity to do so. However, the one thing that I can’t help but think about is how much I miss the city (or maybe it’s my car that I miss).

Recently when I lived in the city, it wasn’t like I really lived there. Part of the problem was that my boyfriend “wasn’t allowed” to be at my apartment (based on roommate rules) and as a result I felt restricted in the time I could spend there as well. Since my boyfriend and I liked to spend most of our nights together, this made it extremely difficult to spend a lot of time at my apartment and we ended up spending most of our nights at his parents’ house outside the city. I haven’t truly lived in the city since 2008.

When my parents decided to sell their house in the city and move an hour north, it was time I got a car. This made the whole transition a bit easier. I was still able to drive down to the city whenever I wanted, but the car restricted me from going out and drinking since I would have to find a place to sleep.

Some things happened between me and my parents and I ended up moving over an hour west of the city, but this only lasted 4 months before I decided it was time I moved out on my own.

While living on my own only lasted 9 months, during this time I rarely used my car, so I lent it to my sister. Since it was costing me to keep the car insured I didn’t want this extra burden given that I never used it anymore. Everything was accessible via public transit, and whenever I went anywhere outside the city the boyfriend and I went together and he would always drive (I’m much better at being a passenger during long drives). Since my sister needed a second car, we made a deal that she would buy the car from me and I would no longer need to pay for the insurance anymore. This was perfect! I was living on my own and I was able to save some money at the same time. But the living situation didn’t last as long as I hoped.

During this time, the boyfriend and I discussed buying a place together. However, if I were to move out completely on my own and pay rent by myself, there was no way I would be able to save enough. So, I moved home…

Well, I moved my stuff home. Since I got rid of my car, there was no way I could actually move home and be able to get to work every day. I didn’t want to buy a new car since I was supposed to be saving, so the boyfriend and I had some serious discussions, and one of them was with his parents and we thought it would be the best idea if I moved in with them. This way I would be able to spend a lot of time with the boyfriend, have a ride into work and be able to save up for our future together.

So far this has been working out great! The only thing is I now wish I had a car. I can never win!

The boyfriend drives standard so I can’t use his car, and this can be frustrating when I want to go out for lunch with a friend, or meet a friend for dinner. I almost never get to do these things because I have no way of getting myself around. The boyfriend is completely open to driving me, but I feel bad. And when you can drive yourself, you get to choose when you’re ready to leave.

This Friday, the boyfriend was asked to play in a softball game in the east end of the city. This leaves me with a couple of options:

  1. Go with the boyfriend
  2. GO train to the west end of the city and walk home, then not really do anything because once I’m there I’m stuck there without a car
  3. Visit my sister (this is if she is available, I haven’t asked yet) because he can drop me off on the way
  4. Visit a friend (I would need to figure this one out soon since I haven’t asked anyone yet), and get dropped off and picked up along the way

D and C aren’t too bad, but if I had a car I could do whatever I want. I could go home and then go out. I could go visit a friend and leave when I am ready to leave.

And it’s usually on these occasions (when the boyfriend has softball) that I do see my friends. It makes it easier to plan something when I know the boyfriend will be in the area.

Maybe I’m being selfish, but it’s nice to have the option to pick up and go whenever I feel like it. I mean, I’m not complaining about the boyfriend not driving me, because he does and I appreciate all that he does for me. But I would love to have that independence again.

All of this is completely my fault. I had a car and I gave it away. It wouldn’t be very smart of me to buy another one now because I don’t have that much saved (especially since the boyfriend and I want to buy a house hopefully by the end of the year). But 8 months ago I would never have imagined that I was living with the boyfriend out of the city. I was only a couple of months into my lease and loving how accessible and convenient everything was to me. I do believe that when I made the decision to get rid of my car, it was the right decision at the time.

We live and we learn.

The moral of this story: I have to learn how to drive standard. Or to stop whining… either one works.

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