New love *sigh* it’s a beautiful thing!
It’s a feeling of complete and utter happiness. You get butterflies in your stomach just thinking about the person. You find yourself wanting to talk about the person all the time and finding little ways to slip their name into a conversation. You drop everything and anything if it meant you could spend even 5 more minutes with that person. You smile more often and day-dream about them.
Sometimes you get so lost in new love that you forget about your friends. A couple of weeks go by and you stop and think “oh my, I haven’t talked to ____ in so long”. But you forget to send them a message. And then a month or two fly by, you’re busy doing everything with your new love. You’ve gone on a small road trip, or have seen a couple of movies. You may have met the family one Sunday afternoon. You still haven’t messaged that friend. But it doesn’t matter because you are so in love.
You made plans months ago to go on vacation with your friend, but how could you possibly spend a week away from your new love. You want to spend every waking moment with this person. So you cancel your plans. You feel a little guilty, but you know that they will get over it. You have never cancelled on plans before so this one time won’t hurt.
Over the next few months you make a point in spending a couple of hours with this friend. Maybe you get your nails done, or you go out for coffee. But it’s nothing like it used to be. You don’t want to spend an entire day/night away from your love so you make as little plans as possible. “But you’re still seeing her” you tell yourself “so it’s ok that I only want to spend a couple of hours with her”.
And then a year goes by. You may have seen this friend enough times to count on one hand. It makes you a little sad, but so much time has passed, how can it ever be the same as it was before?
The new love turns into much more and he proposes *yey* and you think “who am I going to ask to be in my wedding party?” The friends you once thought would be standing next to you sharing your special day are no longer your close friends anymore. You’re stuck with your sister and his sister and hopefully a best friend. What happened to “I have too many friends, how am I ever going to choose who is going to be my bridesmaids?” You lost touch with so many “friends” over the course of your new love.
My biggest fear: Not having any good girlfriends.
I’m guilty of the above. Over time I’ve lost touch of some dear friends. Some of which are friends I thought would be standing next to me on my big day (not that it’s happening soon or anything). But as my “friends” start to get engaged and get married and I see pictures pop up on Facebook (the devil) it makes me think about my own situation.
And as new relationship bloom around me and these trends begin to happen, I fear losing these friends.
My biggest fear is turning 30 and not having a single girlfriend to celebrate with me. Or getting married and (as much as I love my sister to death) only having my sister standing next to me.
As we get older our priorities change. My priorities stand with my career and my future family. My boyfriend is my number one priority. But that shouldn’t mean that my best friend(s) come last. They still hold a special place in my heart, but how do I stop myself from forgetting about them completely? And, as we get older our priorities vary from person to person. Just because I want to focus on my career and my future doesn’t mean my friends have the same ideas.
Its reasons like these that I feel “girl time” is so important – even if it happens only once a year.
New loves can consume you. But everyone forgives the blindness a new love causes. You just have to make sure that it doesn’t last forever. You usually gain your sight back after a year or so.