Tag Archives: working

I miss this

I really do! I’ve barely had time to breathe though.

I’ve been so busy getting my personal trainers certificate, I’ve started teaching bootcamp and I’ve been spending every free moment at the gym.

I think about blogging, but then I can’t think about anything to say and I get frustrated and put it aside.

Part of the problem is there is nothing new in the relationship to talk about. We are both so busy we rarely spend a whole lot of time together. And when weekends approach we try not to make any plans so we can spend it together, but that never happens.

We hit a bit of a rough patch but we are working through it. I think it had to do with the fact that we haven’t had much time together, and I wouldn’t count the hour before bed, frantically running around the house getting ourselves organised for the next day, as “quality time”. It’s been tough. But we’ve been more open about our feelings and increased our communication so we don’t end up resenting each other because of it all.

It also doesn’t help that we are both conflicted with our careers. I’m so confused, and worried that I’ve chosen a path I’m not happy with. I don’t feel satisfied with my choice and I’m scared I’m getting too old to start something new. That and I would looooove to start my own business but financially it may not be possible. All this scares me. The boyfriend just isn’t happy and needs to figure out a solution to his discontent. He travels so far for work and it takes up so much of his “free” time, I would be frustrate too!! But he just doesn’t know what to do. We are both in a little bit of a funk.

And I miss reading all my favourite blogs as well 😦

Ohh to have time…

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I missed my own anniversary….

You know how you know you’re a bad blogger? You miss your own blogversary. Yeah that’s right, I missed it. Not intentionally. I set up a reminder for myself on my phone and I even tweeted myself a little “Happy Blogversary” but I didn’t come to the one place I was actually neglecting, my blog.

So here’s a little update on my life:

I’m insanely busy at work and I get home around 6:30 every night, get a work out in, scarf down my food and either work some more or it’s already so late I have to go to bed. Weekends have been just as crazy, but busy with social activities (at least I’m getting some socializing in). This past weekend was a full weekend of drinking and I’ve made a decision to give it up…yeah right! Impossible with my job. So instead I’ve decided to just not drink this coming weekend.

The internet at home hasn’t been working. It works sometimes, mainly during the day when I’m not there. So this has kept me from posting anything. I know I could be writing something and save it for when the internet is up and working, but I’m lazy.

The boyfriend and I have been looking at places. We are considering moving out on our own, which is so exciting!!! But don’t get too excited, it’s not going to be as soon as you think. We are taking our time looking, we want to find the right place and not jump into the first thing we see.

I’m more in love with him every day. This change in my life has been so uplifting that I am able to really see the good things that I have, and one of them if my boyfriend. I am happier than I have ever been (with him, but also with my life in general).

The only thing I need to improve (well, it’s definitely not the ONLY thing, but it’s at the top of my list) is making more time for my friends. Maybe when I get settled into the job a little more and get into a groove I’ll be able to start planning my social life a little more.

I feel like I’m all over the place and I haven’t had any time to just sit down and think. But I’m not complaining, I love the way my life is turning out and I couldn’t be happier with any of my decisions.

I promise I’ll finish my update on Hawaii. I’ll even post some photos.

XXOO

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Random News

Dear readers,

I am pleased to announce that a change has been made. Thanks to my personal meeting, I was recently offered another job.

This position is exactly what I’ve been waiting for. It’s the reason I went to school for what I did, and when the opportunity came up I had to jump all over it!

Two weeks today I will be starting my new adventure with a new company and a new position. I’ll be in the same field, but a new industry and a better title!

The sad news is that I’ve found most of my posts have come from the extra time I’ve been afforded at my current company. I’m not one to go home, open up my computer and type a blog post. When I’m home I like to work out, relax and just do about anything other than be on a computer. This is because I’m on a computer for 8 hours every day. My fear is I will not be able to provide as many interesting posts (not that all of my posts are very interesting) as often as I’d like.  But I could very easily be jumping to conclusions. Who knows, maybe I’ll have so much to share that I will change my ways and post on week nights/ends.

 Either way, I will find the time for all of you.

Oh and other news: I’m probably getting another car, which means I won’t miss the city anymore!!

Some random things: 

  • I’m like really confused why most of my views come from the google search “make bed” and “how to make bed”. Do that many people not know how to make their bed???
  • All my hard work on training for the half marathon feels as though it’s been thrown out the window. I’ve been drinking too much on weekends and the longest run I have been able to do in the last 3 weeks is 10K. The half is in 24 days, I might be screwed.
  • As a sub note to the above, I’m pretty sure I’ve gained a couple of pounds (did I mention I lost 16 since Christmas?!?! Yeah, not anymore)
  • I currently LOVE taking pictures in Sepia – apparently EVERYTHING looks better in Sepia
  • My best friend told me on Saturday that having one nail painted a different colour from all the others is fashionable:

(I like it)

  • I might get a feather in my hair
  • Did I mention how excited I was about getting a new job?? Well, I’m REALLY EXCITED!

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It’s Only the Beginning

I think I’ve reached my boiling point and it’s time for a change.

Part of the reason I have been hesitant to start looking for a new path in my career is because I feel bad for leaving a company that has provided me with some really great experiences. If it wasn’t for this place, I wouldn’t have started my path in the right direction as early as I did. I really lucked out with this job.

I was fresh out of school, no job and no connections. I began my search for a full-time position online but saw no response. I had multiple interviews, but I had nothing, other than my education, to back me up. One of my friends had experienced the same problem and decided to go through a temp agency. I was hesitant because I heard only horror stories of temp agencies, but she assured me that it’s nothing like the stories I’ve heard. I tried it out and within a week I had interviews lined up.

Since I’m part of the generation that believes I don’t need to start at the bottom and work my way up, I can get a manager position right out of school, I was turning down some great opportunities with high-profile companies because I didn’t feel like the position was up to my standards. I had a reality check when I realized I was running out of the little money I had saved, a car I needed to pay for and my student loans creeping up on me. I took the next job after that. Which landed me here.

It was actually a pretty bad job. I started as a telemarketer. I did it for four months in order to pay for all my new bills (while looking for something in my field of study), until a position in another department opened up and I knew this was my opportunity. I got the job after a month of training, interviewing and proving I could do it without any experience. I was extremely thankful and worked my butt off to prove they made the right decision.

Jump ahead about a year when my manager leaves. Some background on the company, your only chance for a promotion is if someone leaves. I knew that my being here for only a year wasn’t long enough to grant a promotion, but I hoped that it meant some kind of growth opportunity for me. I had many talks with the senior management about my progression and that I would love to take on more responsibility. Initially, he was excited. I stepped up and took over the position for two months while they searched for a replacement. I was promised so many great things… that was until my new manager started.

Every promise that was made has slowly been revoked. I’ve lost more responsibility than I had even before my old manager was here. Although, I seem to be busier than ever. This could have something to do with the fact that the new manager doesn’t really know what she is doing and I not only have to do my own day-to-day work, but hers as well, without getting any credit for it. Every day I am presented with more and more frustration and I make a point to handle it all with a smile on my face. But this is all causing some serious stress when I get home. From 9-5 no one would ever know something was bother me (other than my friends who I talk to about it), but when I leave here I feel like a ton of bricks just fall on my head and shoulders and I want to crawl in a hole forever.

I would also feel terrible for leaving because so many people have left in the last year. I can see what kind of stress this is causing senior management. I don’t want to be part of that stress.

But another reason I get nervous when I think about looking for another job: my boyfriend works with me. We met here, we started our relationship here and I have no idea what I would do without him. We drive into work together, eat lunch together, and play on the work softball team together… I just can’t imagine being at work and knowing that he isn’t close by. I know that the day will come when we no longer work together and I believe that it would be a good thing for the relationship, but it’s scary taking that first step away from it all. It’s what I imagine a mother would feel like when her child starts daycare after spending every day together on her maternity leave.  

It would be a major change, but I think it would be worth it. I’m not as happy as I could be, and in turn I feel I am not giving my relationships (with the boyfriend, friends and family) all I can give.

But where do I start?

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Three Things

The boyfriend and I had our first date night in a long time this weekend. It was nice! We were both so exhausted from the week that we decided to take it easy and have a relaxing weekend. While at dinner, the boyfriend asked me “If you could only do three things for the rest of your life, what would you do?” That was a tough one, but the three things I chose were:

1. Reading
If I could read every day for the rest of my life I would be happy. I love to read. unfortunately I haven’t been reading as much lately, but I am determined to get back into it. It took me 4 months to finish Eat, Pray, Love which is an unusual length of time. Normally I would rather read than watch TV, but life has taken over and I don’t seem to have much time for either.

2. Blog/Write
I love blogging. I am so happy I started. But not only do I love blogging, I love writing. I used to write short “poems” all the time. I stopped, but I sure do miss it. I also love reading blogs (this brings me back to number 1). A few of my favs: Cocktails at Tiffany’s, SimplySolo, Pink Giggles, Danielle’s Dish and most recently Inside the Nice Guy (these are just a few of my daily reads). I would blog every day if I had enough to talk about, and if people cared enough to read it.

3. Workout
Yes, workout *gasp* (for those who know me, this might come as a surprise). But this is a new found love of mine. I don’t know what changed, but I absolutely LOVE LOVE LOVE to work out. I love how I feel after and I regret it when I don’t. If I had more time in the day I would workout more than just a measly one hour. But with work and sleep and other priorities that come up sometimes that’s all the time I have to dedicate to a workout.

Last week I talked about feeling undervalued, and this question the boyfriend asked got me thinking. No where in those three did I mention my job. I’m afraid that I made the wrong career choice. If I can’t love what I do, how can I expect to do it for the next 40 years? And, I’m not even sure I’m good at what I do. Sure I did well in school, but that’s because I was more concerned about the marks I was getting than the actual work I was doing. Don’t get me wrong, I don’t HATE what I do. I enjoy it about 60% of the time.

Well, this got me thinking. Maybe I could incorporate the three things I would do for the rest of my life into my life. Not as a replacement for my job, since I can’t imagine any of those three things paying enough to live, but as an extension. My new goal for 2011 is:

take a fitness instructor course

Yep! I’m going to take the course before the end of the year. Once I take that course, I will then be able to incorporate reading (I will read about fitness instructing and eating healthy), blogging (I will post at least one blog a week on fitness and eating healthy) and I will workout more so I can learn more about it.

Who knows where the course will take me. Ideally I would become a fitness instructor at least once a week in the evenings/weekends and that way I get to do the things I love, plus do my day time job. I think it’s a win-win situation!!

Wish me luck!

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